We all lead different lives – some constrained, some challenging, some luxurious, others simple. Even in The Truman Show, a fabricated life is still a life. Everyone has one.
How much determination do you need to live the life you want? It’s a tricky question, difficult to measure. I came up with a visual analogy, though. Remember those liquid density experiments from middle school?
Think of a U-shaped tube. Orange liquid represents your life expectations; blue represents determination. The orange liquid’s density shows how clearly you see your ideal life. The blue’s density is your drive. A float separates the liquids. When balanced, it rests at the bottom. If it shifts left, negativity prevails; right, positivity prevails.
What does this mean? Here are some scenarios:
- Low expectations, low determination: The float stays put. You’ll likely have a peaceful life.
- High expectations, strong will, hard work: Equilibrium. You earned it.
- Envy others, feeling it’s out of reach: Float shifts left. You’ll likely be stuck, blaming the world, full of negativity.
- Aiming too high, lacking skills: Blue liquid’s too light, float shifts left. You’ll be spinning your wheels, feeling sorry for yourself.
- Idealizing, seeing only the good: Orange liquid’s too dense, float shifts left. Life will seem harsh; you might get discouraged and lose your way.
- Seeking simplicity, but believing in better: Float shifts right. You’ll sense life’s richness and excitement.
- Modest goals, no strong will, but taking small steps: Blue liquid’s dense, float shifts right. Your rewards may exceed expectations.
There’s an extreme, like in Trainspotting: “I choose not to choose.” Complete spontaneity, no plans, no goals. No responsibility. This kind of aimless life needs zero determination, zero expectations. The U-tube is empty; the float’s balanced. Avoid this balance.
Conversely, there’s no opposite extreme. Desires and drive vary greatly. Everyone’s U-tube is different. That’s what makes the world diverse.
This model isn’t perfect, but it’s useful for self-reflection.
I’m not a workaholic. No job, not even entrepreneurship, has ever consumed me entirely. I always reserve time – sacred time – for friends, sleep, reading, writing, or simply relaxing and daydreaming. Nothing else really captivates me, so my expectations aren’t high.
My ideal life? A comfortable home, ample free time, a few close friends. And, like now, a relaxed pace. Satisfying my curiosity, becoming a knowledgeable person. This seemingly inexpensive life actually requires a solid financial base, which I lack. But money isn’t the core issue; there’s a way to live at any level. At least the goal is clear.
I tend to be inert. My resolve isn’t that strong. My current life isn’t threatened, so where’s the urgency? If a crisis hits, and life gets hard, I hope I’ll find the will.
Regarding drive, I have some strengths. I’m decisive on small matters. I might not be fully prepared, but I’m quick. For big decisions, I don’t get lost in details and rarely second-guess myself. I’m good at turning ideas into action.
Finally, since I’m generally happy, my U-tube would show: both sides low, blue slightly denser, float a bit to the right.
Am I content with that? Hmm… I’m not sure.